Have you got something important that you have been trying to achieve for years but it just isn't happening?
If so then I think you will agree that it is a horrible place to be. You want something so bad but you are getting nowhere. It can leave you feeling powerless and depressed about the whole thing.
You know it’s your calling and you would give anything to acquire it but you just cannot seem to make it happen or get a break.
This is applicable as for the race driver who consistently fails to raise funding year after year as it is for the person who once again fails to lose weight. It’s frustrating but you want this thing so much so you just keep going for it even though it isn’t offering you anything back.
I have seen people in their 50's who are still chasing the dream they had in their 20's, in some ways it's admirable to see their level of faith and desire but on the other side it is painful to watch them destroy their lives and delude themselves.
Whilst on this planet we all have the right to do whatever we want, we have won the chance to be here in the first place so we should spend our time celebrating our life and living it to the maximum.
I'm all for that but in this blog I want to wake a few of you up and hopefully inspire you to make some simple changes to the way you are working so you can make some progress.
"I've Tried Everything"
Firstly I want you to abandon this type of phrase, abolish it from your vocabulary.
“I’ve tried everything” has to be one of the most used phrases by people who are at their wits' end when they are struggling to make things happen over a long period.
They pick up the belief that they have tried everything when in fact they haven't even scratched the surface of the amount of approaches they could have took.
In their head they may have taken many different actions as they live it out in their imagination but in reality they haven’t done as many things as they think they have.
If they had tried EVERYTHING then they would have accomplished it by now or at least have got close.
I can't tell you the amount of times I used this little gem of a sentence when up against it, and it still tries to revisit me now in times of difficulty but let me remind you that this belief is total bullshit.
You may have tried everything that you were 'prepared to do', everything that doesn't put you at risk of failure or doesn't require too much effort but there is no way that you have tried absolutely everything.
On this subject it's astonishing at the amount of things that people will not do because of their fears of looking silly infront of others, if you have these fears as part of your guide for the actions you take then i'm afraid to say that you will never make it.
If you ever hear someone (or yourself) saying that they have tried everything then interrupt them immediately and ask them to list out the things they have actually done. The things they fully applied and that didn’t work.
You will find that the list isn’t very long and that many of the things they did do may not have been done properly or were never going to be the most effective actions to take anyway.
We Fool Ourselves
When we have something in mind that we are trying to achieve we think of certain actions that we could take, we play them out in our mind and weigh up their effectiveness.
As far as we are concerned we have virtually taken that action because we thought about it, we have spent many hours researching it and have assessed whether that action would be worth taking.
This makes us feel as though we did take the action but in reality we have just wasted time making up a future that doesn’t exist.
Somehow we class this as doing something that will take us closer to our goal when in fact the lack of physically taking that action has just cut off another route we could of took, we have talked ourselves out of it.
You Are The Problem!
If you have something that you are still struggling to accomplish or fulfil then it's time to be honest and give yourself a mental kick up the back side.
Literally get someone to kick you in the ass right now if that works because you have spent too long kidding yourself.
If you haven't made progress on something that you have been working on for years then it's time to admit that it is not going to happen unless you change the way you are working or change something about you.
Plus find out why it has not happened up to now, there will be a reason whether you like to admit it or not.
Do not keep doing something that is not working in the hope that something will come your way because it just won't, there are no gifts in this life, you get what you create.
If you are a driver who is still struggling to win then it's time to look at your skill level.
If you are still not attracting the sponsorship needed then you are doing something wrong or talking to the wrong people.
If you are failing to stand out in this sport then you are not driving quick enough or have a bad image.
If you have great ideas but fail to make them happen then maybe you are afraid of failing.
If you keep finding yourself in bad relationships then it's time to see if you are doing something that is contributing to this.
Whatever it is you need to understand that you are the most influential part of your quest for your goal, you have the most impact, so if it is not happening then quit blaming others or the situations and change the way you are behaving.
You truly hold the key and determine if this is going to happen or not, no one else. It is either your ability or the way you are working that is letting you down.
You may be failing to see what you look like to others, you may be so close to the problem that you need someone from the outside to give it to you straight. This is something we all need from time to time.
If you work in the right way and take the actions that most people are not prepared to then you stand more of a chance.
Your success is totally down to you, even if that statement is not fully true it is the kind of belief that will force you to take your success as your responsibility and get you to act in a way that demands results.
This is how to succeed.
Nobody else is going to make your dreams and goals come true, it is all down to you.
If something is not working then have the confidence to change what you are doing, use different people to help you, try a different route and if that doesn’t work then try another. Keep that mentality going and eventually you will open doors and things will start to happen.
Do not let your dreams grow stale by being afraid of failure or by not giving it your all because you will regret it in the future.