It’s tiring to hear so many people in the paddock and in life bitching about how they have been hard done by or how things are so bad for them at the moment.
Don’t get me wrong, I have sincere sorrow for those who have had recent misfortune, they have full right to feel down if they have just experienced some kind of loss or hardship but that’s not what I’m speaking about here. Instead I am talking about the individuals who time after time complain about an issue that they face.
For example the driver who is struggling with their results and is blaming the team or personnel again – even though they are with yet another team this year and the results are still poor.
Or the race team manager who is blaming the drivers for the team’s poor results again – even though this year they have different drivers.
Or the person who is once again complaining about how bad their relationship is – even though they are in a relationship with a different person now.
If you find yourself in this bitching cycle as you go through your life (we have all been there) then I want you to just stop for a moment and take the time to answer this question……
In this crappy situation that I find myself in time and time again, what has been the one constant entity/body that has always been present?
Think about it.
No surprise here, it’s you. The one thing that all of your shitty situations have in common is the fact that you were there.
It may seem obvious because you have to be there to experience it in the first place, but if we want to fix this stuff then we need to look at what links them all.
This isn’t to blame you for everything that has happened because that would be untrue and misguiding, instead I am saying this to remind you that you are the one ingredient that is always present and in turn has the most effect to change the outcome.
You are always there at the heartbeat of these challenges so no one but you has more control of the given situation.
This then means that if you as a person started to see things differently, started to work and act in other ways then these outcomes you are getting can be influenced.
Put simply, it is solely down to you to change anything about yourself, your life and your results. No one and nothing else is as influential as you.
If you seriously want to make some shifts in your life then you have to take on the full responsibility for it, you have to become the leader in your own life (at work or home) in order to finally get what you have been after for so long.
You know this already but this blog post is here to give you that friendly reminder before you waste the opportunity you have right now.
What do you need to improve?
There will be an area in your racing life or personal life that you need to improve right now, something that is making you feel unhappy or frustrated.
Take a moment to think of it now…….
As you think of this challenge I want you to picture what your life will be if this problem stays as it is for another 12 months or for the rest of the year. If you were to waste yet another year living like this.
Take the time to see it now and feel how bad you will feel if you let it carry on.
Turn that pain meter up by focusing on the repercussions of staying this way, of it being the same for the next 3 years, by seeing the people who are affected by this in the long run or by seeing how depressed you will be when you lose your position. Do whatever you can to bring this future reality into this moment.
Very often we find ourselves in a place where we know we should change, we can forecast that if it carries on this way that we will eventually hit some kind of trouble or pain but we do not act, only to regret that lack of action and kick ourselves later on down the line. We could have seen it coming, it was inevitable but we still didn’t do anything about it.
I don’t want that for you.
So if you are in a shitty situation right now I want to help you step up as a leader in your life and start to make some serious changes.
Things are NOT going to get better.
Whatever you are looking to accomplish or turnaround you must fully acknowledge that it will not happen if you do not take the reins.
You must become the real driver and direct which path will be taken from this moment on.
No war is won without good leadership, no company becomes successful without good leadership, no sports team wins the championship without good leadership and you will not get what you want here without good……….you got it.
I know very few drivers or team owners that have this leadership skill down, yes they can manage things, they can put fires out as they arise and keep the ship sailing but very few of them are actually leading themselves or their teams towards victory.
They may get significance through their job title but they lack the real leadership talent that will create success and build a long lasting empire.
You Are The Key!
If you are sick of getting the same unfulfilling results then it’s time for you to take the spotlight off the problems you are facing and to point it directly on to you.
Let that light expose you.
You need to see first-hand what you may be doing that may be allowing these situations to happen and on the plus side to show the skills you do have that will allow you to change the situation.
You need to see the real you, the person that is influencing your life the most and creating your present life.
Answer these questions:
Within the area I need to improve, have I really been the person I could be, using my true potential, or have I been kidding myself?
As a driver have I completely led my team and everyone in it?
As a team owner or team member have I been the ‘go to guy’ and the one that has inspired all those around me?
Have I been the person who has taken the controls and steered the ship towards its desired destiny or have I been a passenger lately?
Have I been the authority in my professional relationships to get the deals done, or have I been too laid back?
Maybe in your personal life - Have I been making my relationship grow every single day or am I letting it die by being ungrateful for that person. Or am I acting differently to when we first met?
Again we need to cease focusing on the problem in hand for a moment and shine the spotlight on you to see is we can unearth what is really going on here.
Every true leader takes on this viewpoint, they ask better questions when troubles hit and take on the responsibility.
Leaders position themselves at the pivotal point in any situation, they act as if their destiny in their hands and do whatever they can to create their desired vision.
I urge you to do the same from now on, to hit each part of your professional and personal lives in the way that a leader would.
After all you are leading your life, so you may as well act out the part instead of letting others do it for you.
I like to keep these posts short for ease of reading so let’s get to the point.
So you have something that needs to change, it could be your results, your team, your personal life or anything else. It is something that is bothering you right now and you know that it’s time to sort it out.
Perfect, if you are realising this then let’s split your chosen challenge in to 3 areas. These are areas that you can control in any situation so you can improve it and start to make things as you want.
Area 1 – Get Clear
See the problem for how it really is, strip away all the “How must this look to others” and “Why me” type of thoughts and see what is actually going on here.
Make it a simple problem to solve and detach emotions from it as you lay out your plan of attack.
Also make sure that when you are listing out the challenge you face that you see it through a fresh pair of eyes, change your body position and breathing compared to the normal position you have when thinking about the problem. If you become tense when thinking about it then this time have a fat grin on your face, play with this.
Be somewhat positive yet distant, as if you are coaching someone else with this problem. You are good at giving others advice so use that talent you have.
Get clear on your plan of attack and what needs to be done.
Area 2 – Get Everyone On-Board
It’s time for you to lead other people, know how to talk their internal language and inspire them to help your cause by meeting theirs.
If you are a driver then win back the confidence of your engineer, show them how you are now focused on turning this around and out work every driver on that team. Make your team manager want to help you, let your mechanics know that you do actually give a shit.
Win people over at all times, even if they dislike you they must respect the way you are working.
As a team owner / manager if you are needing to repair the team then you must have great people skills, they must look up to you as their leader and respect you. Put staff in the job roles that use their skills best to create an indestructible winning machine. That’s your goal.
Every leader needs to know how to influence and get the most from people, spend time learning and practicing this. A team or company is only as successful as the people within in.
As a driver are you making sure that you have team members on your side? If not how can you win them over to make them want to work harder for you? How can you ‘talk their language’ and get more from them so everyone is pulling together?
Area 3 – You
Here is the big one, you must become the type of person who can pull this off.
You are the true leader here, the commander in this battle. The way you act and react on an hourly basis will decide the outcome. You must be congruent with the goal in mind and everyone needs to see this, in doing so you will gain followers through your actions and behaviour.
You must sharpen your skills and learn all the things that will help you not only be better at what you do, but have the knowledge for how to do it.
A leader never stops improving themselves, they consistently practice the fundamentals and make new distinctions.
Always grow yourself in some way and understand that happiness is in the pursuit, it is what makes us humans feel alive.
To Sum Up
I want you to spend the next 5 days on a verbal and mental diet, the rules to this diet is for you to cut out the bitching. No more complaining about the situations you are in or how things are at the moment.
Every time you find yourself doing it, STOP, say the words “Cancel Cancel” and straight away replace these negative thoughts with forward moving questions such as:
“Can I change this situation?” If so then answer this question - “What am I going to do to resolve this quickly?”
If the situation is out of your control then ask yourself “If I wanted to, could I change the way I feel about this?” Then do so by looking for lessons learnt from that event and by asking "What else could this mean?"
No matter what happens to us in life we can either change the event that has happened or we change the way we feel about it.
Take control of this area and you will keep on your path and stay away from the loser’s mentality.
I will do a blog about this in the future to show you this in more detail.
Now get out there and make things happen instead of being a passenger in life.
NB. Cover photo by Ludovic Hirlimann